Saturday, June 13, 2015

On having a bad attitude. And a Specialized.

The squirrel killer.
I probably would have ended up a marathoner on my own.  It's in my nature to make things exceedingly difficult for myself for the sheer pleasure of simply getting through it.  Masochist, much?
The cycling thing?  No: this is all Michael's doing.  I have been happy toodling along on my hybrid - even going so far as to do a couple of Mediofondos where people looked at me with incredulity.  Yeah: I was slow, but I didn't care - I've got four hours on a Sunday to ride 90k and check out some scenery.
I didn't care so hard that for the longest time I rode Michael's old POS that weighed a million pounds when he would go out on his hybrid.  Eventually he talked me into getting my own hybrid: a Specialized Sirrus.  And yes, that bike was much, much faster, lighter and easier to ride.
Then Michael bought the Ghost from MEC and the Specialized Allez that he used to ride was just sitting there.  Why don't you try it?, he said.  You might like it, he said.  It's faster than a hybrid, he said.
Here is my penultimate riding story: one that has been repeated several times since I've hopped on a bike (any bike).  I rode my hybrid out to Horseshoe Bay with Michael early one morning.  It was kind of scary and I wasn't a very confident cyclist, but whatever.  On the way back, coming through West Van, I pulled up next to a roadie and I said "good morning".  He didn't respond or even acknowledge me.  When the light changed he took off.  And I took off.  At the next light I was about half a second behind him and I pulled up right alongside him and said nothing.
Here's where my bad attitude comes from: run a fucking marathon.
Full stop.
I have been on the road bike for a couple of weeks now, and shit it's fast.  And I'm having a lot of fun.  And people very rarely pass me.  And the other night I almost killed a squirrel.  But you know what else?  It's way easier than running.  And there are a lot of things that you can do to make your ride easier if you cycle, but there is relatively little you can do to get through 26.2 "easily" except to train hard and be in good shape.
Here are some of the asshole comments I have about roadies:
  • It's like high school elitism all over again: how much money you have determines how fashionable you (and your bike) can be.
  • Fat people go downhill faster.  Seriously: I can't keep up with people that weigh 180lbs on the downhill, but funnily I catch them on the climb up.
  • They often don't obey traffic laws which - as a runner, cyclist and driver - pisses me off.
  • They dress like the pros dress, except they're not pros.  I don't put on a tiny bra and racing shorts when I run a marathon because I'm not expecting to win said marathon, yet everyone is decked out with all the gear like they're doing a climb in the Dolomites with a shot at the yellow jersey.
So this is my bad attitude  Maybe I'll bring it up with my therapist on Monday.  I rode on Thursday on a hand me down bike, in shorts my brother in law gave me, and a running tank.  I passed a lot of people and was only passed twice. over 45k.  I would likely beat everyone I saw out there at a foot race.
Yeah, I guess that's it: you can't fake it as a runner; but people sure like to give the appearance that they're something they're not when they ride.

2 comments:

  1. You make me laugh. Reminds me of when I was 19 or 20 and went skiing, my sister and I refused to buy fancy smancy ski pants. We sprayed Scotch Guard waterproofer on overalls and went to the mountains.

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    1. That is the BEST: I love stories like that. You and your sister are awesome.
      Michael has advised me to quit riding unless I can become less critical. It'll be hard: this past weekend I saw a guy decked out in a Sky outfit, as in Tour de France Sky.
      I should just start cycling around wearing a yellow jersey. WTF.

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