Meh

One of the best books you'll ever read.

Kinda lost these days.
Not that I'm aimless, mind.  I've seen friends, had busy weekends, accomplished stuff.  But do you ever find that it's the same stuff over and over again?
This is my day: up at 7am; on the road by 8am: full blown apathy and frustration until 5pm; home by 6pm; work out until 6:45 at the earliest; make lunches and dinners and eat and clean up until at least 8pm; watch Homeland (kick ass show) on Netflix.  Perhaps have an agitated convo with my partner to do with: sports; politics; Mort Zuckerman's car accident (I side with Mort); peoples' sense of entitlement; traffic; or economics for a period of time that is punctuated with wild hand gesticulations.
One of the members of the exec committee actually came to look for me at the gym the other evening.  Am I that routine?  And no: I don't shave my legs a helluva lot in the winter, so sucks to be him with me in my ratty gym shorts.
What's the point?  The only time I'm engaged is on the weekends with Michael.  Five days a week I'm a functioning automaton. This is life?
Yadda yadda John Ralston Saul's "Unconscious Civilization".  Yadda yadda Camus' "A Happy Death".
I've been imbued with this sense of imprisonment and ennui and frustration for innumerable years.  And, like Michael says, I have the smarts but I don't utilize them to find a way out of this monotonous beige gruel that is the majority of my life.
A lot of people obviously take the Eckhart Tolle route and decide to accept their fate, but I've never been one to accept anything.  I rail against everything, on a daily basis.  It's tedious, but it makes for some hella fast 10ks after a particularly shit work day.
Meh.
Like in that book that I half finished writing that one time: "At least we're not getting raped in the Congo".
Obviously life isn't so crappy that I haven't put more effort into what could be misinterpreted as another way out of the regular nine to five.
And not getting raped in the Congo is also a big plus.
UPDATE: I realize this was a shitty, downer, sense-of-entitlement post and for that I apologize.