Friday, March 11, 2016

Locke was a goddamn terrible movie

I hate his face.
Still here.  Not a whole lot to say.  Or, a whole lot to day depending on what you want to hear.  Here, however, is an update on what is currently on my mind.
Working papers – please god make year end stop.
“Locke” – look, I hate Tom Hardy’s face, but we gave the movie a go given its 91% rating on Rotten Tomatoes and HOLY SHIT is this a terrible movie on so many levels.  First of all, Tom Hardy acts like a robot throughout the duration of him (in his vehicle on the way to see the woman he knocked up during a one night stand deliver their baby) losing his lucrative job and his wife leaving him.
Second of all, even after stating it was the one and only time he had ever had an affair in his marriage, his wife says it’s over because the difference between once and never is just insurmountable, and that he is not to return to the house that he most likely paid for, and which also houses their two teen sons.  
Third, who the fuck drives to see a woman that they only saw and were with ONE TIME deliver a baby.  Also: who doesn’t wear a condom?  Also, if you want to get knocked up without the father’s consent, don’t ruin the father’s life. 
Lastly, he is a concrete guy and this whole movie is unfurling as he is supposed to be responsible for what is going to be one of the largest concrete pours in the world, and yet when the whole thing starts his wife calls and says she's bought his favourite beer and sausages and is wearing "the shirt" (soccer jersey) and when is he coming home. Later, when he is let go from his job, he tells his (ex) second-in- command it's going to be a long night and he has to stay on the site to make sure everything is okay throughout the night.  So does it not reason that, had Locke not been fired, he would have stayed there all night?  And if so, does the wife know what her husband does for a living?  That he is going to be responsible for this huge pour?  Likely not going to be chilling at home with beer and soccer, yeah?
Anyways, I discussed it with Michael who was in total agreement with me, but says that likely “we’re not like most people”.  I guess not!  I guess we are the 9%??  Someone else please watch this movie and weigh in.
Lastly, I am wearing a dress today and though my husband reassures me I look great, I feel like a dummy.
Oh - one more thing - what is this stupid upcoming movie with Superman fighting Batman.  Like, why would they ever fight each other?  Was this ever a a thing?  I thought they were on the same team like Ben Carson and Donald Trump.
Dumbest. Concept. Ever.

2 comments:

  1. OMG, that movie sucked big time. I never rent movies and when I do I feel like I HAVE to watch the whole movie or I'm wasting money. I was so mad at myself about this one. I rented a sucky movie AND I wasted 2 hours on a sucky movie. Jody watched the first 15 minutes, basically told me what was going to happen and went to the garage or to bed or where ever he goes when it's a bad movie. I put a sticky note in the case that said "THIS MOVIE SUCKS!" I still get pissed off when I think about this movie.

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  2. alright im way late to this party and i agree with your review, the movie sucked. but cmon batman and superman HATE each other. your credibility kind of is thrown out the window if you didnt know that and review movies haha

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