Be it resolved that I shall never offer up personal information about my life to any of my coworkers again, unless asked directly, and even then I shall give only the most perfunctory of answers.
Between shoveling a disgusting amount of food into his pie hole and making incredibly lengthy personal phone calls, my coworker managed to find enough time to tell me that it is supposed to be sunny tomorrow. Here is how our conversation went:
N: Supposed to be sunny tomorrow.
Me: I need it to be sunny on Sunday: I have a race!
N: Supposed to be rain on Sunday.
Me: I just need it to not rain for a couple of hours to get it in.
N: My wife says I have to stay home on Saturday for gardening.
Me:
N: But I can play cricket on Sunday because of rain. I don't have to do gardening that day.
Me:
My fault for trying, really. Kind of makes me feel like this. The one thing I do miss about my last job was the social aspect. We had a couple of coffee breaks and lunch together every day. We had normal, human conversation. I knew the names of their spouses and children, what they did on the weekend, what their hobbies were, etc. I mean: we have to spend eight goddamn hours together a day, so why not make it a bit more palatable?
Then I feel bad, like: am I not an interesting person? Why does everyone feel compelled to tell me about what they are doing (for example N gardening and playing cricket, and V going to her best friend's retirement dinner tonight) but no one thinks to ever, ever ask me?
And then I think that this is why I have few friends and really would like a dog.
If they did ask you, during your telling them the information they asked, one of them would burst into the room running their mouth about something they thought was SO important, Much more important than anything that someone else could have been in mid-sentence discussing. Sometimes I just want to say, "I'm sorry did the end of my statement get in the way of your interruption?" Sometimes I hate people.
ReplyDelete"Sometimes" you hate people? Fack. One of my most oft repeated phrases is "I hate people" to which poor Michael shakes his head and says "I know".
Delete