Really? How many things are wrong with this article? Like, a lot.
In other exciting news, I had a rather interesting post-book club convo with a fellow reader tonight and she's the closest in proximity to my age, and she and I seem to share the most in common, and she had said she was going to lend me a book and then felt bad that she forgot to bring it tonight so I was going to email her and say hey, if you ever want to go for coffee and a chat let me know, except she's probably 5 - 10 years older than me and is unmarried and dresses like I do (like Ellen) and doesn't wear makeup or style her hair and has never mentioned a man and now me, with my brilliantly dykey haircut (which she really liked)... ahhh, god.
You know? And it wouldn't even be the first time I inadvertently ended up on a "date". With a woman.
I've cleaned a carburetor, sanded and painted a bedroom door, drywalled and laid carpet, been mistaken for a boy (twice), shot a .22, attempted to punch a guy at a bar, raced my (at the time) sports car, am sporting a nose ring and a tattoo, and I frequently kiss my arms and request that people get tickets to "the gun show".
I have no idea why people think I'm gay.
I should probably make a sex tape to clear things up.
Meet her for coffee and while you are there, casually say that you are going to have your significant other/boyfriend/live-in/Michael meet you and would she like to join you guys for dinner. Or you can do like my sister who has been mistaken for years because of her dykey hair and ways. She just makes inappropriate growling noises and drools at the first hot black guy that walks by, and keeps doing it until they hear her.
ReplyDeleteWe actually don't have black people in Vancouver. Not sure why. I'll have to growl at a white guy. I'm sure this will go over swimmingly. ;)
DeleteThat's too bad.... be sure not to show too many teeth, a toothy growl sends the wrong message.
ReplyDelete