
Really.
Really.
Just give me my fucking free pastries you septuagenarians with your exuberant sense of self-entitlement and your incredibly large engagement rings (I pointed to one of them and whispered "Do you think that is a one carat diamond?" and then later indicated that is what I would like in my life to make me happy).
After I parked my 1999 Honda Civic (ahem, the EX model) in the parking lot I said, "Don't let these other cars make you feel bad. You're just as good as they are. And please don't tell anyone that this Mac and Jac blazer is second hand."
That's about the extent of it.
Oh, except for when the cashier at Safeway held up my de-alcoholized wine and double checked with me that I knew that it was, in fact, de-alcoholized wine. I said that yes, I understood what I was buying and that surely it was as good as it sounded. He laughed.
Basically I'm just really anxious about tomorrow because I hate Valentine's Day, but I do get all warm and tingly about this.
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